mixEd Up

Been so long since I wrote a poem.. but i wouldnt define this as a poem...its just an imagination of a man's mixed up feelings ...

So many things so many hopes
so many times so many nights..
i wish i can do.. will my wish come true..
i wanna walk away..
heading straight into white pathway..
filled with beautiful flowers and breeze..
filled with cloud of love..

why do no one ask me whats wrong?
am i that invisible..or wat..
i wanna see the beautiful sunshine everyday..
i wanna touch the sky each day..
every day and every night belongs to me..
dark clouds been passing by.. frequent nightmares..
how can i do it? how can i do this?
each day my mind filled with so many questions..
why is this like that and why is that like this..
cant it be more free..
can it be more happy..?
when i cry i turn off the lights..
so shameful to cry in bright..
when i smile i still turn off the lights..
so mixed up ..with the fear of screwing up..

the world will be here..
the feelings wont be the same..
from the day we are born.. we fight for one..
SURVIVAL..
someone will come and some will go..
i dont worry about it..
when you walk even in the night, even the shadow will let you go..
thats when you will understand..
its you and you alone in this world..