Ringtone, Dingtone!

p/s: Few moments back I was going through Yahoo news and found an article which attracted me and tickled my humor bone as well. The excerpts “It says that the use of "Allah" by Christians could cause confusion among Muslims and encourage religious conversion, which is illegal in Malaysia.” Dey come on lar, are you all for real or what? First thing how can usage of a word change a person’s mind and his thinking towards his own religion which he/she have been practicing for the past donkey years. Secondly since when conversion is illegal in Malaysia? Thirdly if you dick jerkers think that throwing Molotov and stones can actually change the fact, dude you are wrong. All god is one and one god for all. So stop being that shiteating morons and use your minuscule organ called as brain to think how can we live in harmony. Ok I am not going to continue talking about this as this whole article is not about the church burning incident and did I mentioned that I have stopped writing political related articles? Yes, I choose to refrain myself from writing political related articles as I realized that with brains full of tanah-liat, we won’t be able to inject a single drop of sense into them so Rujj why waste time?


Ok now the real deal article. Ringtone. Yes effin ringtone. As now the technology have advanced so much you can just transfer the whole .mp3 as your ringtone. I don't know how many of you realized that there are some “dickyLornaz” who just love to put their ringtone so effin loud till it can be heard from the next building. In my office there are some fler(s) who will put their ringtone so loud where at time I just feel like walking to them and shove the bloody phone up their arse. Anal is fun at time, bytch! If you know that you are in office or meeting, for god’s sake put your phone to silent. We do not want to hear your distorted 50cents In Da Club blasting while in office or meeting. Even worse sometimes, these flers will actually take out the phone out of their pocket and adjust his glasses and keep staring at their phone. Know why? Effin tryin to figure out who’s number is it. This practice is common among some old uncles. You have to answer the phone to know who is calling unless you are making a video call. The technology is not that advanced yet for you to know who is calling from an unknown number. By the time you answer your phone, it will stop ringing and the whole circle starts back again. Believe me though if you have nice ringtone it’s nice to hear but not more than 10 times for the least.

I have plentiful collection of all the songs, so I don't want hear your ringtone. It’s not a cherishable moment. If we are attending a meeting, we are obliged to put our phone to silent or discreet mode. Not only at meetings, maybe some discussions, speech, seminars, cultural shows etc. Based on my experience attending some seminars and talks, before it starts we will be informed to either switch off the phone or change to discreet mode. All of a sudden in the middle of the class or seminar, there will be some Andy Lau ringtone or some shitnoise Pink song ringtone which can breaks my ear drum, goes off. Effker, its killing me! Don't you understand simple English? Put your phone to silent mode! Though I don't do that in my office but at least I will have separate settings on my phone where when I’m in office I will change to meeting mode so the ringtone and SMS tone will be soft just for me to hear it. Can’t you all like do that or your phone is too effked up till there is no settings as such. If you answer yes to this, my best advice would be use your phone as vibrator, or at least a dildo.

I still remember there was I went to a temple, I can’t remember which one as I have visited too many temple and I am a holy person.LOL. On one of the pillars in the temple, there was notice saying “Please do not use your phone in temple unless if you are calling god.” Can you beat that!! That is one good stuff. We should come up with ruling, if your ringtone irritates me then I can take the phone and shove up your mouth for girls and arse for guys. Nah kau L**nca*!

You know right that you won’t be able to get the actual quality one a song when you upload to your phone as the reading bytes for PC and mobile phones is different. That is reason you will find the hissing sound and terrible distortion on your ringtone once you have upload the song to your phone and that is when people like me gets irritated. So the next you would ever want to use a song as an mp3 please think twice and be considerate to others. If you are someone from my office and reading this, I hope we will still maintain our relationship as working colleagues because the last thing I want to have some shit argument with you regarding your ringtone and the last thing you would ever want to hear from me is some vulgar scriptures which I can keep it flowing without stop. Or worst case scenario I will get the lifeless-dickjerkers to throw some Molotov on your face. Satu Malaysia!