To ammu

Imaigalai mella thiranthe paarkum poluthu
Nee enthan munnal iruke venum endru
En manam varam ketathey…
Yenthan aruginil nee vanthen..
Naan unthan anbu nee koorum
Anthe orey vaarigalil..
Yen moochikatrey adengi kollem..

Unnode pesum ore nodiyaal irunthalum
Yen manam vanathai noki sirageadithe parekum..
Yennerum yendrum naam iru kaigal inaiya
Naan inba kanavugalil mulginen
Anthe neram eppo varum?
Eppothu varum..
Ninaivagum yen varam..
Nirainje valthe yen manam...

Kanne, pala natkalai naan unnei thunbe padithinalum
Un anbaal yenn manathai kavarnthe vittal
Un uthotorum punnagaiyaal enna manathai
Sirakootil adethi vaithayei…
Nee pesum varthagal aneithum ena kaathil
Mel isai kalanthe paadalai ketkindrathe..

Yethana jenman eduthalum nee mattum thaan
En aruginil vendum, yeppothum
Mudhalil unnmel kaathal vanthe poluthu
Kodi minnal enn manathil paainthathe…
Enna vendu appoluthe enake puriyavillai..
Pala pengalai naa paarthe palaginalum
Iruthiyil nee mattum thaan enake vendum endru
Yen manam thinamum yengiyathe..
Athey..

Baby
I may not be someone who writes you long poems
And give you so many roses
I may not be the most romantic person in this world
But for me you mean everything,
So many girls so many days
I passed by, but one glance from you
Girl, make me for my world…

Dedicated to ammu kutty..

mixEd Up

Been so long since I wrote a poem.. but i wouldnt define this as a poem...its just an imagination of a man's mixed up feelings ...

So many things so many hopes
so many times so many nights..
i wish i can do.. will my wish come true..
i wanna walk away..
heading straight into white pathway..
filled with beautiful flowers and breeze..
filled with cloud of love..

why do no one ask me whats wrong?
am i that invisible..or wat..
i wanna see the beautiful sunshine everyday..
i wanna touch the sky each day..
every day and every night belongs to me..
dark clouds been passing by.. frequent nightmares..
how can i do it? how can i do this?
each day my mind filled with so many questions..
why is this like that and why is that like this..
cant it be more free..
can it be more happy..?
when i cry i turn off the lights..
so shameful to cry in bright..
when i smile i still turn off the lights..
so mixed up ..with the fear of screwing up..

the world will be here..
the feelings wont be the same..
from the day we are born.. we fight for one..
SURVIVAL..
someone will come and some will go..
i dont worry about it..
when you walk even in the night, even the shadow will let you go..
thats when you will understand..
its you and you alone in this world..

Angels Comeback

When I opened my eyes.. there u were smiling at me
I felt like an angel in front of me.. oh gurl im so lucky

The feel was like standin in the rain ….
You showered me with ur sweetness and made me realize that it is love..
When u passed by me you didn’t caught my eyes
When ur beyond my sight I realize ur my life..
Im stuck in this beautiful accident
Im not escaping even if theres a way

U were total stranger to me..
I was looking at you when u dun realize…
I wanted you when u dun see it
I felt that I want to spend my life with you even if you don’t
Im carrying another soul in me.. my love soul..

I feel glad for the feel make me lose control
Now I know the real feel of love

When u walk under the moonlight the stars will disappear
When u walk under the sun the rays would not want to leave
Just because one reason.. Your smile your tenderness
My life slipped and fell into the well of love…

Filled with your affection..
Craving for your attention….

hunny..

honey oh honey...
sumtin is happenin to me..
i know this is the moment of truth..
plz don't let us part even for a minute or even a second



When i'm with you my world is beautiful just like heaven
feelin us so well blend...
trust me baby ..
i need you in my life honey
my very special valentine..
i wanna keep on loving you throughout my lifetime..
where were we all this while
my heart is askin me..
where were you girl..
my heart's craving
how did you came into my world and..
turned it into heaven..
i know we are meant to be together..
because we belong to each other..
you're the reason of my laughter..
you're the reason for my happiness.
you dragged me out of my loneliness and
showered me with your tenderness..
when i walk with you..i know..
when u hold my hands..i know..
when im with you..i know
the stars became so bright and the
sky became so blue..made the moon so beautiful
i knew..because of your love baby..
you just swept me off my feet and turn my whole world around..
i just love to see our shadows pinned on each other
when we walk down the lane..
just like how im so indulged in you
i would save your every word and make a poem out of it
i breathe in your life just like how you breathe in mine
this is a promise girl..
I will keep on loving you till the day you're gone
bcoz i wont leave you back here alone..

Sumtin I wrote on 7/10/2004 for Mogan

Will i be able to see you..
Reminding all the best time together..
Staying so far from me, a place I cant reach..
Can you be replaced? Can you not to be loved?
Life is not what it seems to be
Words cant express what you mean to me..
Even though you're gone..
We still believe you're living..
We pray to god that he will keep your soul in peace
We hope that you know we love you and still do..
Hope you know its hell here without you..
May all the angels look after you..
Where one day when we look up the stars..
We will see one bright star shining on us..
And we know that you're still living...
your life after death..
YOu will always be remembered..
may your soul rest in peace..
We always love you..

RuJJ

Written on 07/10/2004 at 0845pm for their funeral last respect. This write up have been put together with him in his coffin

we pray for you brother..

brotha..
do u still remember...
the time where we used to fight and laugh together..
there was a time where there are so many problems that we went through
do u still remember how we used to study at your place..
we wont be studyin we will be crackin jokes and laugh so much
till your house owner come knocking on the door asking us to be quiet
i bet you still know how we used to tease rambo shankar...hhahahah
when he walkes into the class we use to make those jokes about him
from the back row..
not forgetting prathap.. the questions that we asked him ...hahha
then the trip to penang.. yeah man.. we almost got killed ...
chased by the rempit whacked some fellas by the road
hahaha that was one hellova great time..
i sstill remember when you used to tell me
we must always have an aim in life.. must live life to the fullest
as though today is the last day for us on the earth...
this very same day.. Oct 4th 2004 we did our DCN paper
together with Jay, Niq and others...
Now its the same date Oct 4th 2007 ...
you are not here with us..
the memories still fresh in mind.. the whole
situation still runs in our minds..
its like a horror movie that i wouldnt want to watch again..
a time which i dont want to turn back...
a moment that i wish to forget...
lookin at you lying on the road covered with blood..
i still cant take the fact that your are no more here with us
there are so many things that i want to share with you..
but how?..
about my dance, my life, my job, my secrets, my everything...
but how?..
until this fine day ..we still drink together.. we still celebrate with you
me, suresh, sosa, niq, kapoor, rahul and all others...
you always remain in our mind ...
you are always with us..
may god bless and rest is peace..

My brother...

Dedicated to my beloved brother Mogan who passed away on Oct 4th 2004
Rest in Peace.

Ek Mohabbat

Its 31st August 2007.. 50 years of merdeka. So how far have we came for the past 50 years... well i think there's quite alot. BUt there are some smitches who claims that we are no where in this 50 years. Are you sure? Look back at the time where immigrants were brought in to Malaya (then) to work in mining and rubber estate. Well time have passed by and country have changed BUT know wat.. mankind have not changed yet. They still kill each other they still cheat each other. Why?? No matter how many times u ask that question, its always unanswerable. So many killings and so many polution..

So many Malaysia have been in so much peace but lately do you realise that there are some conflicts? Some racial issues? Din you fail to realise that how much all of us fought for freedom? Have some respect please. And to that anti-gov dun you dare to start any shit.. im tellin.. pls lets be in peace. Have you people tried recycling? Take a moment and think, how much of paper plates and notes we waste each day. Put all ur dry batteries in a plastic bag, save all ur newspapers and sell. You dun have to bundle up in front of your house, just when the surat khabar lama comes jual sajalah.. And smokers. SMOKERSSS.. hellooww.. when there is sign not to smoke it means DONT SMOKE.. dun try to be hero by smoking. Fuccers do u realise how much it can hazardous for others and as well as the environment. Think we should start puttin up those pictures on the cigarette box like how it is in New Zealand, Australia and Singapore. Smoke in a place where its designated for you.

Malaysian, jangan ludah sana sini boleh tak?? Think 2 days back i wanted to withdraw some cash from RHB near Taman OUG.. PArked me car and was walking to the bank and i saw this uncle walkin to his car and know wat the fucc he did?? "kkkRRRaaaiiishhh... tuuuhhhhss.." eeeewwww babi uncle.. this is public place lah!! i reli felt like grabbin his head ask him to lick it back.. bohsia ! u see this is wat i meant.. show some love to others and environment.

why ammu this fellas all like this ah?

"hey why u so like dat ha?"

there is so many things that i wanna write for this merdeka but i reli got no energy to sort out one by one so when im free i will do so.. and im kinda gettin addicted to bloggin ..its like drugs man.. its thousand seven and we're back in action.. come with tha flow..
so is it you or is it me? naana neeya?
who to blame for not loving humankind..
who to blame for not loving the endangered.. fuckin salman!!
who to blame for not respecting others..
who to blame for not recycling.. me or you?
so for this 50 years of independence, i would like to ask all of u all to think back of wat our people have done and lets make a better future..
its all in our hands..



One Love
Ek MOhabbat
Oru Kadhal

F.R.I.E.N.D

friendship...
why is this seperation..
i jus dun understand why..
there's pain in my heart..and
i jus dont know .how..
love and friendship.. is alike and so fine...
cant differ which is high..
the road of this life..
may end anywhere..
a place where we are not aware

..we keep moving forward despite all this..
just to keep the frienship..flourished..

how..?

how did u do it...

carving smile on my face

when im downfulfill my heart when it emptyheld my hand when i stumbled

how did u do it...

showered me with caringnessmade me realise that i have someone to love

how did u do it girlmake me feel so preciousmake my life so meaningfull

wanting you to be with me every second and every minutes

i remember the moment i was talkin down the lane alone

i then saw a light at the end of the road

i thought i wouldnt be able to reach it

then i opened my eyes seeing the lightwith my hands held by you...

the moment i thought my life was gonethats the moment u made me realise that u are there

for me

now i cant help it

to stop thinkin bout u

now i cant help it girl

not to feel for you or stay next to you

i kept askin how did u do it..now i cant help it..

wat u wanna call this

Whuttha f**k are you looking at
I slap ya face till u won forget
dont make me cut ya neck
Since mah ni$$az aint turning back

So many b!tche$ passin by
Waiting for tha whites singing lullaby
Cops pullin trigger chasin my boys
Homies got no where to run and hide

Why am I doin this
To make my colours happy?
I aint teaching my kids
Im telling to kill tha freaks
Poppa say we are like losers
I dun think so coz we are believers

Lemme grab ya hands
Push ya towards the end
Wat happens u dun give it up
Just like us dun give a f**k

That’s my dough u holding it
U betta let go before I blow a head
Bang bang shot y’all whankaz
They cant be like us
Callin yaself playaz
Wanna see the ridaz
We are muthaf***in rappaz

cant u see??

why cant u look at me..im here standin
why cant u understan im tryin to tell sumtin...
my world changed when in my life u came in
words jus got held up in my throat
maybe its too early for u to realise...that i keep u in my eyes
try to see that im tryin to hint sumtin .. things that cant be explained
things which cant be restrained...my world seems to complete
im in my own world ..no one can compete..
u make my life so cherish..though things that i say now is too foolish
why Oh why..cant u see...
im trying to tell sumtin...

I Cry

Sometimes when I'm alone I Cry, Cause I am on my own. The tears I cry are bitter and warm. They flow with life but take no form I Cry because my heart is torn. I find it difficult to carry on. If I had an ear to confiding, I would cry among my treasured friend, but who do you know that stops that long, to help another carry on. The world moves fast and it would rather pass by. Then to stop and see what makes one cry, so painful and sad. And sometimes... I Cry and no one cares about why